Hello, Pushkin

#1 - Mae's first birthday was two days ago and I didn't even write a big, long, sappy, thoughtful post, reflecting on what an incredible year it has been. I meant to. I swear. I just didn't have time, and now it seems too late.

#2 - We only got her one gift: a googly-eyed monster puppet which only cost $17. And it wasn't even a surprise. She picked it out herself at the toy store.

#3 - I only took two seconds to wrap it, using second-hand wrapping paper from a better gift somebody else had given her the day before.

#4 - Betty Crocker helped me make her birthday cupcakes.

#5 - We ordered take-out food for her party.

#6 - I didn't even blow up any balloons.

#7 - I didn't even invite any other kids.

#8 - But that was just for the little party. This weekend, we have to have a bigger party for the whole family and I am totally resenting it already. She's going to hate it. There will be too many people, all vying for her attention. All picking her up when she does not want to be picked up. All making too much noise and stressing her out. And it's going to be a lot of work, and it means having my in-laws PLUS my bitterly divorced parents all in our tiny backyard at the same time. How do you spell 'hell' again? Oh yeah, B-I-R-T-H-D-A-Y P-A-R-T-Y.

#9 - I bought Hello Kitty plates and party hats for the second party, but I only bought them because I was with my highly-organized best momfriend, and she was telling me about how she drove all over the city to find Curious George plates for her son's party, and about how she'd already ordered the balloons even though he won't turn 1 until the 15th. Then she said "Hey, want to walk over to the party store and see what they have?" and then I felt guilty... as if the fact that I wasn't planning to buy over-priced plates with cartoon characters on them made me a crappy mother, which maybe it does.

#10 - I'm letting Betty Crocker make the cupcakes for the next party, too.